I received many emails from readers about “where am I” or “hope you are OK”.
I sure appreciated people checking up on me.
To the question where have I been:
I’ve worked my butt off doing all kinds of chores I did not want to do. It took me a month before I could even walk into Ron’s room which actually was not possible with all the boxes of junk he kept in that room. Ron was a pack rat. He never wanted me in that room to clean either. I had no idea where to start especially since I couldn’t even move in it. Taking much flexibility I started to go through box by box, throwing much of it out as he kept so much “JUNK”.
It took me 5 months to clean out and clean up that room since Ron never even wanted me to clean the windows in his room. The two windows still had the stickers on them from the time they had been put in. It took me a whole day on a ladder to clean those 2 windows believe it not. That included the blinds too.
Next I hit the shed where he dumped most of his stuff. Another awful job. Mice and birds demolished things in each box and some of the boxes were rotten. I finally, after a long time, got all that cleaned up. Oh, yeah, when I started on that I couldn’t walk around in the shed either.
All of that added to everything else I had to take care of since Ron died. Too many to even mention.
At the time this picture was taken, the cancer we never knew about was already invading his entire body. He was in pain constantly but he thought it was only back pain. Ron did not look like this when he arrived here. He was vibrant, strong, did not look his age. This picture is one of a much diminished man. He was so thin I could see the outline of his whole spine.
How am I doing:
I feel sad looking at this picture of Ron and could not bring myself to look at it until now. I miss having his companionship and “waiting on me”. LOL! He spoiled me to death.
I am mentally doing OK except for all the anxiety of the problems I keep having, but I just ask God for help and He usually comes through. I have to admit to sometimes falling down not remembering He is with me. I guess that is human nature. I hope.
It is a hard life for me but not the first time. So I am used to getting along by myself and doing fixes myself sometimes figuring them out by myself or finding information. That used to be Ron’s job, fixing things. I still haven’t caught that damn mouse however. It continues to elude all my traps. And shame on Zima for not getting it.
This thing has been my biggest PIA:
Lately I drive it for a couple of weeks, then it goes back to the mechanic for this repair, that repair. It’s a black hole where I just love to throw money down and go broke. (sarc)
You would not believe how many people come up to me in a parking lot or even at stop signs wanting to buy this thing. Amazing! Well they couldn’t pay me enough to make up for all the repair money I’ve put into the damn thing. I’m sure I’d take a big loss. Of course I’ve never asked any of these people what their offer would be. They tell me they just love that old jeep. LOL!
I just had the fuel pump, among other things, replaced so maybe it won’t use so much gas. I need someone like Bob Roller for that opinion and I am most likely wrong.
Besides this jeep, my teeth started to give me tons of problems and tons of big dental bills. Not to mention the dry socket I got after having to have two teeth removed. If you never had dry socket, believe me it is unrelenting agonizing pain.
So between the jeep and my teeth I am constantly broke. Oh, well, what else can I do with all my money? (sarc) The two of these PIAs keep me broke. And don’t believe people when they say poor is better than rich. LOL!
But I do have many riches that are priceless like the friendships I have and the people who help me out in all kinds of ways, mentally and physically. I have my two grand children who love me to death and even write emails to me now. I live on a beautiful farm in a beautiful rural area with plenty of quiet, except for Merlin who barks every time he hears something outside because he is so protective of me. Right now there is plenty of noise on the farm due to rotating, plowing, spreading manure and all the other things that go on at a farm but to me they are nice noises, earthy noises back to a time that does not exist in so many places any more. And the cows love Merlin. They never fail to crowd at the fence when they are right behind the house to see him. It’s so funny and Merlin licks on them. Hilarious.
I caught Merlin off guard with this picture. He seems to hate it when I get the camera out to take pics of him. So the look on his face is such surprise. He usually gets the time to turn his back on me. He’s like the Amish who don’t allow pics of themselves. But he is my constant, loving, companion. He actually hugs me by putting his face up against mine and holding it there. He gives me plenty of doggie kisses and protects me. He never lets me out of sight always watching over me. He has all kinds of expressions for a German shepherd. When he looks at me with his adoring eyes lookI melt and spoil him even worse than you can imagine. I couldn’t have a better dog.
In one of my future articles I will tell you about how I’ve changed the senior center being a trouble maker. That is a funny I’ll tell you all about later.
God bless you all!
And Susie you are a great friend gal. I wanted to make sure I didn’t leave you out this time although I didn’t mention any names this time.