Wicked Commentary

Most of you know by now I was in hospital with pneumonia.  The doc threw me in there so fast I didn’t even have time to blink.

As the nurses were getting me ready for my “lovely” stay, 3 of them were working on me at one time. One was taking blood from my right arm while a second was preparing my left hand for the needle to the IV and the 3rd one was giving me an EKG. Then a 4th one arrived for me to do a breathing check.

We got to laughing so hard because I kept joking about all that was going on and was this the new way of caring for patients under Obamacide. Oh, they laughed uproariously in hatred too of this foul so called law. We started cracking one joke after another. When the ordeal was complete they all told me they wished every patient was as fun as me. I grinned evilly. So easy to make people laugh when it’s about King Stupid.

Each and every time they had to come into my room to do something they had to wheel in this mega-multi-gigabyte monster machine called the Obamacide Computer of Data to be delivered to the Death Panel, whoops I meant the 15 member IPAB.

Absolutely everything had to be loaded into this grotesque sized computer on wheels that the nurses rolled around all day and all night.

New rules were applied under the Law of the King’s Obamacide. Each nurse had to introduce the next nurse who was taking over his/her shift. Each nurse or an aide had to visit my room every hour to check in with me to see if there was something I needed. I only needed sleep, ironically the only thing I couldn’t  get. After all I was deprived of it all night long with someone coming and doing something to me every damn hour.

I had to have MORE blood taken. I had to do another breathing treatment. I had to have a heart sonogram. Another bag of antibiotics had to be run on my IV buddy. And oh, how I hate those IV buddies. It makes it so difficult to go to the bathroom shoving one of those inside the bathroom with me.

Then if I was delirious, I thought someone else was in there with me. Shock went down my spine. OMG!  Who in the hell was that?  Lucidity would slowly creep back and it was just the IV buddy with 3 bags hanging on it. I thought it was a person with 3 heads. You can imagine how frightening that would be.

When one of the IV bags was empty as you know the blasted thing starts to beep. I used the call button to get someone in to take care of the annoying noise. Of course, in those cases, no one showed up. Therefore I took it upon myself to turn the damn beeper off and reprogram it.

Finally a male nurse named Wayne came in and saw what I had done. He told me sternly I was not to fool with the precious programming on the IV buddy. But after he saw it had been done right, he just looked at me with disbelief.  Hmm…how did she know what to do?  There was no way for him to know I was a computer specialist and I didn’t tell him either. I just stared at him with my evil grin that Purplegimp aka Lucie taught me.

I liked Wayne a lot because he too hated the King or soon to be Pharaoh of the new Caliphate formed in the great Satan. We became buds immediately sharing our hatred for the King. Almost every nurse hated Obama and his stupid and complicated Obamacide.

However I came across one male nurse who was a liberal and that was a time for me to really show how evil I can be.

Story continued on the following article, In Hospital, Part II

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Comments on: "In Hospital, Part I by Peppermint" (14)

  1. willibeaux said:

    Well now Mrs. Pepper’awk! Sounds like your hospital had a bunch of those evil right-wingers taking care of you.

    ‘oohRah! 😉

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  2. I cannot wait for the next part!

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  3. Pepp…ROTFLMAO….it seems like you can take just about any situation and turn it into a hilarious story! You know how sorry I am you got pneumonia (I’m not going to get started on your first doctor’s visit and that POS assistant that misdiagnosed you…damn *itch), but I’m so happy you’re finally starting to get your strength back. Is this Obamacide shit not just crazy?? Marx Reincarnate just pushed back our medical care 100 years…

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    • Dave,

      I knew if anyone would get a laugh outta this you would. After the fact I always do turn it into something funny. How else does someone stand my life. LOL!

      Oh, yeah, that was my first encounter with the Obamacide and what a POS. It has put so much more work on those nurses, therapists, etc. Who needed their lives this much more complicated. Certainly not nurses and doctors. You can see why so many are quitting and if they make a mistake they are fined, (the hospital) so the people working on the floor have to keep checking over and over everything they do.

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  4. Well,ALL good comedy has that element of truth to it.

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  5. Ms. Pepperhawk was the beneficiary of expert medical advise from afar. She has proven to be an apt pupil in the art of keeping hospital staff off balance and always wondering what she’ll come up with next! I’m just glad she’s home so we can share ‘potty’ stories.

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    • Lucie,

      Yes, I’ve been trained by the mistress of evility. Thanks for you approval that I was a good student in how to keep the staff off guard. LMAO! You are cracking me up. Share potty stories indeed. We do have our share of them I must say that! Including the one we had while you were here.

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  6. Donna Rabus said:

    Oops – I read the 2nd part first. Good story,Pepp. That you are back home and getting better. Take care and get lots of rest.

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    • Donna,

      Doesn’t matter what part you read first. Glad you enjoyed a bit of humor. I’m trying to rest and also do some things so I can gain some stamina. It still is not there.

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  7. Pepp, great that your back home recuperating. Glad you made it through Obama’s obstacle course. A three-headed person LMAO. And that “machine” gets me, almost Owellian.

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    • Bull,

      Thx, I am very glad to be at home. Those hospital beds are not meant for sleeping. I could never get the small of my back supported for some reason.

      Right, that machine is Orwellian. Monstrous. And I felt so sorry for the nurses having to wheel that damn thing into everyone’s room all the time.

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