I observe that there are people who do not want government to give any assistance to anyone no matter what the circumstances. Then those who are of like mind pat each other on the back for being so pure, so independent, never will they get ill, never will they fall upon bad times. At least that is what they think. One could come to a false conclusion I imagine that these certain people believe they are God. It never occurs to them that God controls things, not them.
They have no idea that a misfortune could arrive at their door any time. God has a way of showing these types of self-satisfied, drunk on their own visions of immortality and never having illness thinkers, who the boss is. And when He does, there may not be anyone there to help them. And their savings very well could be wiped out with one catastrophic illness. Oh, no that will never happen to those kinds of people. I guess they imagine that their savings will suddenly reappear after it’s long gone and they cannot work any longer to save up for the next trauma.
If these kinds of people who see any government help as totally unwarranted and evil, then these same said people need to stand up and do what they don’t want the government to do. Take care of others, volunteer your time with someone who is ill or disabled. Bring some sunshine into a sick person’s life instead of ranting and raving about the “government” doing the work and their tax dollars paying for it.
Guess what for those of you who hate government to help anyone, the government would not be doing it if families and extended members helped them out. But how many families do you see that do that? They don’t want to be “BOTHERED”.
This is not the kind of country I grew up in. Families, extended members, neighbors all helped one another out. Do you do anything to help those less fortunate than you? If not, then you have no excuse for raving about government assistance.
Families are fractured today. We barely have family units consisting of mother, father, sister, brother. Never mind there are usually no extended members who would aid their parents, their children, their brothers. You get the idea. Families are not even bonded in the small family unit. Nobody knows these days where anyone is. I admired Rick Santorum talking about how important families are and how much structure means to the whole of our society.
With the family unit so fractured, who among these kinds of thinkers would keep their parents at home and change their diapers and feed them? Yeah, those who complain of government assistance need to put their money where their big mouths are. I highly doubt these selfish individuals would ever do anything like what I described. They would rather put them in a nursing home because then they don’t have the dirty work to do or have their lives interrupted.
Today is a whole different day than when I was brought up. We took Grandpa and Grandma a ride every Sunday and stopped for a bite to eat or my Mom fixed a basket of food to be eaten later. I enjoyed these extended family trips. They were little day trips that we all so enjoyed whatever the destination was that we could go in a day’s time.
My Dad made sure his parents got to go out and enjoy things when they couldn’t make these little trips themselves. We had many a good time on these little trips and saw a lot of beauty wherever we went. They were not costly junkets, just gas money and it was cheap back then.
After my grandpa died my Dad took my grandma to live with him and his wife. No nursing home for grandma. She died of colon cancer at my Dad’s house where she needed to be. And yes, he and his wife changed her colostomy bag too. Those who want to get rid of government assistance, ask yourselves would you change a colostomy bag? It’s not pleasant you know.
When my Mom had her stroke, I was willing to sell my condo and move to my Mom’s neighborhood. I would buy a house, a little one, and have my Mom live with me and I’d do what I could to take care of her. At the time I had an outside job, a very exhausting one at that, but I figured I’d hire nursing care while I was at my job and take over caring for my Mom when I got home from work. That was my plan but she died before I got the chance.
It would not have been the first time I had to take care of my Mother. And actually I enjoyed caring for her. I felt like I was doing my duty as a member of the family and of this country. I could not stomach the thought of putting her into a nursing home. Now I do realize that it becomes a necessity for various reasons to turn to that.
The Hawk and I have no such family. Times have changed. Other family members don’t want to be bothered, especially after my son took his own life. Now we are like the plague with people thinking if they are around us they might catch my son’s suicide like a disease that he could pass off to them. Also they don’t want to hear about Jeff. It makes them too uncomfortable. I no longer ever mention my dead son to any of my family. In fact about 6 months after Jeff died my family basically cut me off.
If I want to talk about Jeff I can do it with the Hawk, my ever patient and beloved hubby and with Dave Taylor, my new brother, maybe not through blood, but he’s a damn good brother to have. He even likes me to send him pics of Jeff and any writings of Jeff I may have or tell him stories about Jeff. Now what more could I ask for. Hawk and Dave are gems as is Willibeaux.
And of course there is the ever patient Lucie who still will allow me to vent my pain that never goes away. It sticks to me inside my heart where the hole is that can never be healed now. I try to get up and live a normal life everyday, but nothing is normal to me any longer. That’s what a child’s death does to a mother.
When my paternal grandpa was dying my grandma who was only 5’ tall dragged my grandpa all over the house so she didn’t have to put him in a nursing home. By golly, I really don’t know how such a little person like my grandma did it, but she did. She was of very determined stock.
Now, if something happens to the Hawk, I will do the very same thing my grandma did. I won’t allow him to be in a nursing care. First, we don’t have the money for it. Secondly I don’t want him in one of those places having been in them many times as a care taker.
The closest I see as a good extended family are the Amish. I talked recently to a young Amish family. They were on their horses, Rachel and Roy, taking a ride with their two children, Karen Rose age 1, and Justin aged 2. The husband told me if there was ever anything I needed to get him. That’s what neighbors are for he told me. They were the sweetest couple I’ve met in awhile. I was invited to come and visit them anytime I wanted to.
Now the Amish have extended family and they take care of themselves. They all get together when a new house needs to go up for a new bride and groom. They trade among one another so they are not in need of the usual things we are. I believe they are fortunate in a way that they have never relied on electricity or oil for anything. They drive to town in their horse-drawn buggies and use the horses to tow the machine that cuts their grass.
Now, if the Hawk should die before me, I will be left to my own devices. I do not have any family who would help me out and I’ve been told in no uncertain terms “we can’t have you living with us”, and “we can’t help you pay for anything”. Of course the truth is the “can’t” in reality means “won’t”.
Therefore if the Hawk goes to the cowboy ranch in Heaven before me, I’ll probably stick it out for as long as I can on my own. I know I would not want to leave Merlin here to be taken by someone who may not care for him right. So I would do everything in my power to live on my own with no help until Merlin dies.
But, when the time comes where I can no longer take care of myself, can’t fix my own meals, can’t go down the steps outside, can’t take care of my garden, can’t clean my own house, those sorts of everyday activities that we take for granted so much, I will simply take my own life. I’ve already made that decision.
Once I am not useful any longer then I need to go. I already have the pills needed to carry out the job and have peace of mind for the first time ever in my life. For sure it will not be as painful as it was losing my son. After that I don’t know what kind of pain could be worse. And I would finally be able to join Jeff. I know in my heart God would forgive me for taking my life because He alone knows about all the misery He sent me in this lifetime.
And no government nursing care will be spent on me so all of you who decry the terrible government taking your tax dollars away so I can go to a nursing home can rest easy. It won’t happen.